i was making a lot of mistakes and then my archery instructor said:
“you make mistakes because you’re focusing on the target and not on your actions”
and i was like woah
thanks for giving me the best life advice i’ve ever gotten
I just said “that’s brilliant” aloud.
Clearly she wears those short skirts and skimpy tank tops because she wants the d. and by d I mean vitamin d. she wants to soak up as much sun as she can. because revealing clothes are not an invitation for sex u prick
- Me: *sees book store* *looks to friend* *shuffles towards bookstore*
- Friend: no.
did you know that teachers are instructed to get in between two boys in an altercation and break their eye contact because boys will disengage once the immediate situation is interrupted but they’re instructed to like never ever get in between two girls in a fight because girls wont stop after they lose sight and will actively try to go through whatever’s in between them and teachers are supposed to wait for security to break the shit apart
teenage girls will fuck your shit up
so every year after the juniors finish reading The Great Gatsby my high school english teacher throws a Gatsby party at his huge house and everyone shows up in period clothing and Charlestons to 20s music and my english teacher just wears a suit and stands off to the side staring wistfully out the window the entire night
you guys think I’m joking??
what if rocks are actually soft but just tense up when we touch them?
How stoned are you right now?
There’s a joke there between stoned and rocks but I can’t seem to make it
- Period: You want cookies
- Period: You want to fuck
- Period: You want to fuck while eating cookies.
- Period: Let's be sad about trivial things, shall we?
- Period: Kill them.
- Period: Kill them too.
- Period: Kill them and eat their cookies.
- Period: Shhhh it's okay you'll feel better soon.
- Period: HAHAHAHAHA NO YOU WON'T FUCK YOU.
